Monday 22 October 2007

I'm not flirting, I'm just being friendly!

Flirting should be spontaneous, light hearted, and in the moment. I learned this from spending countless hours researching and analyzing people, which, ironically, goes against the very nature of flirting. I also noticed that one’s definition will vary, depending on gender or culture.

The Parisians see it as a game, New Yorkers as light hearted fun, Londoners as a playful communication and Stockholmers as an exciting interaction, most often occurring after inhumane amounts of alcohol. Generally speaking, men see flirting more as a means to an end, and woman, as a way of communicating.

London and Stockholm males had the most difficult time differentiating between when a woman was flirting or just being friendly. But, as one Parisian male put it, "The only time we (Parisians) are being friendly instead of flirting is when we don't find the woman attractive." Assuming that has not answered your question, the most common distinction between the two levels is the presence of a sexual undertone. Thankfully, this is usually a two-way street. If you are feeling it, then she probably is too! The other difference is the amount of touching. If the female is touching you alot, it most likely means that she is flirting, rather than being friendly. But, I must warn you, that this is not a steadfast rule. So please don't blame me if a rather tactile lady happens to be stroking your arm, which leads you make a move, and you happen to have misjudged. Oh well, is what I would say. There are certainly worse things that could happen!

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