Wednesday 12 December 2007

relationship foibles

Yesterday afternoon, at an event held at a trendy bar in central London, I spent the afternoon sipping champagne, while advising journalists on their relationships, or in the case of some, their lack thereof.

You see, I was acting as the ‘relationships expert’ in a product launch for Johnson and Johnson’s products. And, while there were a few blissfully happy women, who even after three plus years of being with their partners couldn’t find a single flaw in their relationships (in this case it was I who had a few questions for them) the majority brought up the same issues. Unfortunately, I had to tactfully advise one that she should break up with her boyfriend. I can just imagine her going home that evening and saying, “Jon, we need to talk. Although, I only talked with her for 3 minutes, the relationships expert at an event that I went to today has advised me to dump you. See ya!” With the exception of this extreme situation (where she already knew what she had to do anyways, I was simply repeating back to her what she had said to me) it appears that lack of time, and different communication styles, were at the root of most problems.

In this posting, I will address the issue of time. No one ever has enough of it. Once we accept this, we can move on from there. Since we will never have the magical 25 hour day, we must learn to prioritize. It seemed like work was infringing on a lot of ‘quality’ time between the couples. A simple question was to ask, was which is a higher priority, work or your relationship? Whichever answer one chooses (and it might not always be the relationship, which if this is the case, a few more questions would need to be addressed) then you put more time into that priority.

Many times, we get so swept up in the routine of our every day lives, that we lose sight of what is important. If all else fails, look at the bigger picture and remember your priorities. In ten years time, what will your memories be made of, the ‘important’ meeting which made you cancel your theatre plans with your partner, or your partner buying you ice cream at the intermission of the Lion King and the two of you ending up with chocolate all over your faces? Now, go sort it out…