The Internet never ceases to amaze me. Not only does it enable you to find the perfect margarita recipe, locate your nearest belly dancing class, and check the price on tickets to Cuba, it also enables 24 year-old boys in Brazil to ask me for flirting advice.
I received the sweetest email from Paolo (name has been changed to protect the innocent) who needed advice about a girl at his college. I have to say that my two younger brothers, and all of their friends, have been asking me for advice on the fairer gender for years. This brought back fond memories.
The reason I am writing a blog on this topic, besides the fact I am delighted to be giving flirting advice to people who dance samba, is that Paolo's dilemma is very common. And, in fact, can be found all over the world. Paolo and a lovely lady at his school have been exchanging smiles. Paolo can feel there is something in her smile, while his friends say that he is just imagining it. First of all, whatever you do, don't listen to your friends! They have biased opinions and their own subjective views playing in their heads. You are the one feeling/experiencing this, not them. As I learned from my research on flirting, good flirting is not one-sided. It takes two to samba!
Paolo is wondering what he should do. I told him, as I will tell you, because you are probably in the same dilemma, that you should talk to her. She is sending you a 'signal of approachability' by always smiling at you. Most likely, she is waiting for you to go over and talk to her. In fact, if you don't, she will assume that you don't like her.
Besides, what is the harm of talking to a beautiful girl? If you don't have any motives or agendas when you begin the conversation (ahem....boys!) then there isn't anything to lose. Besides, worst case scenario is that she is not interested, and then you go find the many others who are interested. It's a win/win situation.
Okay, next query?
I am an anthropologist: I am also a 'flirting expert'. I like combining these fields to create a new focus. These are my observations as I visit different countries, cultures, and mind-sets.
1 comment:
Haven't read your blog in awhile--the internet is a great resource in many ways. What are your thoughts about people who try to flirt online or date through services? As you know, I have had many an experience there, but ended up with the friend of a friend. What do you think?
BTW, (on a personal note my dear friend) for your favorite adorable children, go to my blog to see how Henry's birthday way! ;)
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